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Karen Simmons Thomas Owen Erb Obituary

Karen Simmons Erb (June 4, 1944 – February 4, 2016) and Thomas Owen Erb (February 18, 1945 – November 27, 2015).



Karen and Tom spent most of their lives in Lawrence Kansas, but for the past 3 years lived in New Haven Connecticut. They passed within two months of one another with all of their children by their side. They could not live without each other.


They were parents, grandparents, teachers, mentors, travelers, art collectors, athletes, health food enthusiasts, conversationalists, punsters, political junkies, NPR listeners, movie buffs, and life-long members of the Lawrence Cooperative Mercantile.


Born in Fort Wayne Indiana, they both graduated from South Side High School (Karen 1962, Tom 1963). They left to pursue their educations, Karen at Indiana University (1965) and Tom at DePauw University (1967).


Karen and Tom were together for 50 adventure-filled years.


After graduating from IU in the spring of 1965, Karen followed her dreams by joining the Peace Corps in Nigeria, West Africa. In her first year of teaching in the Peace Corps, the Biafran Civil War broke out in and her school was closed and became a military compound. She continued teaching in Nigeria for 8 more months, but was eventually evacuated from Benin City within earshot of gunfire. This brought to an end Karen's exciting and, at times, frightening 20 months as a Peace Corps volunteer, at the age of 23. She was not quite ready to return Stateside, and decided to continue her teaching experience in Spain and Portugal.


Back in Fort Wayne in the winter of 1967 marked the beginning of "Karen and Tom" and their 50-year love affair. Karen was living in Lisbon, Portugal and Tom was teaching middle school in Wilmette, Illinois while pursuing a Master's degree at Northwestern University. Tom found Karen to be the most fascinating person he had ever met and he was eager to pursue a relationship with her. This was made difficult by the fact that she soon returned to her European adventure, and he to teaching.


Tom spent the next 50 years of his life trying to keep up with Karen! In the summer of 1969, he traveled to Europe to pursue this fascinating woman. He convinced her to return to the U.S. and during the summer of 1970 they took a 2 ½ month, 14-thousand-mile road trip around North America in a Dodge convertible. During that trip, Tom proposed to Karen. She said she would think about it. In her mind, she had more adventures to pursue prior to settling down. In the meantime, she moved to San Francisco to live with her sister Mary Ann, and consider Tom's proposal. Apparently, she realized that life with Tom would be it's own adventure, and a year later, they were married on September 3, 1971. After teaching middle school for two more years in the states, they accepted teaching jobs in an international school in Luanda, Angola, West Africa in 1973. They taught in Luanda during the dying days of the Portuguese colonial empire, while traveling extensively in Africa.


In 1974 they returned to the United States to attend graduate school at the University of Florida. It was here where their family started to grow with Christopher being born in 1975 and Gregory in 1976. After four years in Florida, Tom received his Ph.D. in curriculum theory and Karen received her Master's in African studies. Then, after twenty-six rejection letters, the University of Kansas offered Tom the job of building its newly approved middle school education program. So, after six years living in the tropics and subtropics, they moved back to the Midwest to Lawrence Kansas in 1978, with Chris (3) and Greg (1 ½). Over the next 34 years of living in Lawrence, both their careers and their family grew.


Tom moved up the ranks of the professorate at KU while Karen became an instructor in the Applied English Center (AEC) teaching English as a Second Language to international students. During Tom's teaching career, he co-authored 5 books on middle school curriculum and team teaching, 17 book chapters, and supervised the dissertations of 17 doctoral students. While at KU, Tom founded the Journal of the Kansas Association for Middle Level Education (KAMLE), which he edited for 8 years. In 1994 he became editor of the Middle School Journal for the National Middle School Association (NMSA), which kept him in touch with what was going on in middle school education throughout the United States for the next 15 years. In June 2005 Tom went on emeritus status at the University of Kansas and subsequently held two distinguished professorships at his Alma Mater, DePauw University, retiring from the Boswell Professorship in 2010, at the same time Karen retired.
Upon their arrival to Lawrence in 1978, Karen earned a second Master's degree, this time in Teaching English as a Second Language. While studying for this degree, she taught as a graduate assistant at the AEC, which would become her teaching home for the next 30 years. During her career teaching at KU, Karen twice took the opportunity to teach English in Asolo, Italy. Karen finished her teaching career working with international students at DePauw University in 2010.


As their careers expanded, so did their family. Brian was born in 1982. After three boys, Karen decided to take biology into her own hands and guarantee herself a daughter. The Erb Family adopted Emily in 1989 after two years working with the American and Mexican consulates to secure the necessary paperwork. They made several trips to visit Emily during her two years living with a foster family outside Cuernavaca, and Karen even took Spanish lessons at KU so she could be the spokesperson for the family on those trips. Their family was complete-almost. In 1994 Karen and Tom became foster parents for Reggie Harrison during his senior year in high school. They also had two exchange students over the years, and those students' families have remained life-long friends: Eduardo Molina from Ecuador and Eric Uribe from Mexico.


After several years focused on raising her family, Karen told Tom that when she turned 50, she was going to start traveling again. Many of those trips were connected to international study, Peace Corps service, or weddings of their children, nieces and nephews. They visited Christopher during his time in Ecuador, Spain, and Costa Rica, and Chris' wife Kim during her Peace Corps service in Belize. They traveled with Brian to Uganda during his study abroad experience. The whole family visited Mexico many times over the years to visit Emily's birthplace, once even to meet her birth mother. Since Karen's Peace Corps work and Tom's study abroad in the 1960s, they lived in or visited 60 countries abroad. All told, in addition to Canada, they visited 20 European countries, 7 in Central & South America, 22 in Africa, and 8 in Asia. Their international travel and the wonderful memories it provided was a great source of pleasure for Karen and Tom for many years.


In retirement, they learned that Karen had Progressive Supranuclear Palsy (PSP), an atypical Parkinsonian disorder. In 2012, they moved from their family home of 30 years near downtown Lawrence to New Haven, Connecticut to live with Christopher's family. In 2015, Emily also moved to New Haven to help care for Karen.


Karen and Tom are survived by their loving family, including: Christopher Thomas and his wife Kimberly and their children Madeleine Deone (8) and Emerson Luciano (5); Gregory Marcus and his wife Vikki and their children, Isaiah Chance Gregory (17), Gwen (12) and Griffin (10); Brian Benjamin and his wife Lauren and their three daughters Olivia Karen (2), Addison Quinn (3.5 months), and Jacqueline Roe (3.5 months); and Emily Renee and her Alaskan Husky, Max.
Those who knew Karen and Tom know that they could strike up a conversation with anyone, anywhere. They taught us that people don't care if you speak their language. They will be warm and welcoming as soon as we take a moment to try and communicate. PSP took away Karen's voice, but it could never take away her talent for connecting to people.


PSP was devastating to both Karen and Tom. In a way, however, it was also purifying. Tom was completely dedicated to and focused on caring for his soul mate. As she lost her ability to care for herself, Karen remained determined, compassionate, and focused on others. She was pure love.


Visitation Services are scheduled from 11am to 1pm on Sunday February 7, 2016 at Rumsey-Yost Funeral Home in Lawrence.


Please consider donations to the following causes:


The Karen S. Erb or the Thomas O. Erb Endowed Scholarship at KU.


The Association for Middle Level Education (AMLE ) Foundation in Columbus Ohio.


The Parkinson's Research and Advocacy Organization CurePSP.org


Please sign this guestbook at Obituaries.LJWorld.com

To plant trees in memory, please visit the Sympathy Store.

Published by Lawrence Journal-World on Feb. 7, 2016.

Memories and Condolences
for Karen Simmons Thomas Owen Erb

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Lydia Neu

January 30, 2023

Karen taught children swim lessons at our clinic... she always had a smile on her lips and a song in her heart... she was a very beautiful person!
Lydia Neu

Robert Fisher

September 28, 2020

As the days and weeks pass, and as you return to life's routine, may you continue to feel comforted by the love and support of family and friends.

Courtney Pauly

January 30, 2020

Grief can be so hard, but our special memories help us cope. Remembering you and your loved one today and always.

July 3, 2016

I met Karen Simmons during the intense and demanding period of Peace Corps Training at UCLA as we both prepared for our work in Nigeria. My memories of her are that she gave her very best and always spread a positive, generous spirit to everyone she met. As I read of her life with Tom after those early years, I realized what an extraordinary person Karen was to become as a parent and educator. Karen went about her life with grace and generosity, leaving us all better for having known her.
Sandra Demerly RPCV

Marcia Steere

March 25, 2016

I had always known Karen, but fell in love with her when she came to live with me in Madrid and then Tom when they came to visit me in California. They leave you a wonderful legacy of never giving up on life, continuing to pursue adventure and experience even as it became ever more difficult. You, their children and spouses and families know that you also participated in helping them stay a part of this world as long as was possible. Even as they nurtured you, you have become the nurturers. May their warmth, intelligence and love continue in your lives and in those whose lives you touch. I loved them.

Kathleen DeVore

February 23, 2016

As a high school classmate of Tom and a neighbor friend of Karen, I read of their accomplishments and passions and it made me inspired to try to do more. I'm so proud to have known them, and know their legacy will live on.

Tom is in the bottom row, second from left

George DAVIS

February 16, 2016

As Tom & Karen's chemistry, I am saddened by the report of their deaths. They each did lab assistant work for me and I saw that Tom became a "Distinguished Alum" for South Side High School in Fort Wayne, IN.

February 14, 2016

My condolences to Tom and Karen's family. They and their children hold a warm place in my heart. Tom and Karen leave me many fond memories, both personal and professional. I'm so glad I knew them. Kathy von Ende

Amanda Reves Brinton

February 12, 2016

Karen and Tom were so special. Their home was always so warm and welcoming. I remember cooking and eating meals together and incredibly connecting conversations. They are an inspiration with their passion for travel, commitment to education and ever extending family. I feel grateful to have known them. I'm sorry for your loss and have all of you in my thoughts.

February 12, 2016

Chris, Greg, Brian, and Emily,
We were really saddened to hear of your parents' deaths. Your family was one of the Pinckney "classic" families, and your caring parents were so committed to you. What a wonderful feeling for them to smile down on you all and realize what a great legacy they have left behind. Wishing you peace.
Steve and Mary Grant

Lydia Neu

February 10, 2016

I am so sorry to hear about your parents!! Greg, do you remember your back rehab??? Your Mom was right there by your side... Karen taught kid swim in our pool for years... I then took care of your Dad for awhile.... I have no idea what happened that God took them away so soon... but the thought that they are together is very comforting.... Again, I am so sorry... They were a beautiful couple!

Ryan Morrissey

February 8, 2016

Dear Chris, Greg, Brian, Emily

Your parents were kind, wonderful people. I consider myself blessed to have known them, and your family, for more than 30 years. Some of my fondest childhood memories are of playing with Greg at the big, interesting Erb house. I learned a lot about being human and connecting with others by just watching them. Laughter and love were ever present in Tom and Karen and their unique lives and spirits endure in their wonderful family. We will miss them. God bless you all.

Susan Elkins

February 8, 2016

Karen and Tom were delightful people, and Jack and I always enjoyed running into them at the Merc, downtown, on campus, wherever we saw them. Karen taught our daughters swimming, too, and I know Emily and Mollie Winerock darted about underwater with great confidence--a gift from Karen. We miss Karen and Tom and send our condolences and best wishes to their family.

Courtney Pauly

February 8, 2016

Meeting Karen was purely fate. Everything about her was nothing short of what would come to mind when the sun rises. She was pure love. Karen changed my life. I was and will forever be grateful for the chance to take care of Karen in her last year with us - although I don't know if I would say that it was me doing all the care-giving because Karen certainly took good care of me. I will always remember her warm touch, her soft hands, and her loving smile. There wont be a day that goes by that I don't think about her and the impact that she had on my life. Chris, Kim, Emily, Brian, Greg and family - I am so sorry for your loss and please know that I feel it too. Everyone who your Mom touched feels it, too.
She was an amazing woman who will be greatly missed.

All my love. xo

Charlene Pike

February 8, 2016

We have lost a portion of our past. But people like Tom and Karen Erb are the reason our middle level education profession thrives today -- and can look forward to a promising future.
Tom and Karen were part of the golden age of middle schools. Their dedication to advocating for middle level youth and those who serve them is appreciated and admired. They touched many hearts and left a glow to keep us warm.
Another chapter of history closes as the middle level education world has lost two great friends and pioneers. My heart goes out to you at this time and in the days ahead.

Diane & Kenny Massey

February 8, 2016

Karen taught our young son swimming lessons 26 years ago. It was amazing to watch her work with him; so quiet and patient. I am forever grateful for the lessons she taught him...and it wasn't always about swimming. Thank you Karen. Our thoughts and prayers for the family in their loss of these two remarkable human beings.

Mike & Barb Malone

February 8, 2016

Dear Chris, Greg, Brian, Emily, and families,

Your father and mother will always be in our memories as people who cared greatly about their family and their community. Our lives are richer because we had the good fortune to know them.

We are sorry for your loss.

Jean Erb Schilling

February 8, 2016

Tom, Marlene and myself were the three cousins on the Erb side; Tom being the oldest and most intelligent and Marlene and I possessing all the remaining great adjectives!! Knowing Tom and Karen as adults has been a pure pleasure and inspiration. Indeed their legacy has been in their family and each of you should be so proud. Rest in peace Tom and Karen and knowing you are together again brings a smile to my face. To each and every one of you, many hugs and much love as you go forward in your lives.

February 8, 2016

Karen and Tom were wonderful colleagues and friends. A boat full of memories in our time at KU. It was a delight and most cherished of times. Our prayers and thoughts are with your family.
Fred & Mary Rodriguez

Gloria Jacob

February 7, 2016

Dear Chris, Brian, Greg, Emily and families, So sorry to hear about Karen and Tom. This must be an extremely difficult time for you. Tom and Karen were wonderful Pinckney Parents. They were supportive and helpful and always came to school with a smile. They will be missed by many. Sending warm thoughts your way. Their wonderful family is their legacy. May you find peace.

February 7, 2016

Brian, Chris, Emily, Greg & Families,
May the love and devotion of your wonderful parents & grandparents continue to inspire you forever more.
The Flannery Family

Kay Almanza

February 7, 2016

Karen taught swimming lessons at our pool years ago. Many years after my son had finished with lessons I got a call from Karen. She had just returned from China and had a gift for him. She thought of him all those years later, while in China. She was remarkable. I feel incredibly fortunate to have known such a human being.

Claudine Malone Robke

February 7, 2016

Karen was my mentor and friend. The obituary didn't mention she taught swimming for many years in our community. She has saved thousands of children from drowning with her life saving method of teaching children how to roll to their back if they fell into water. She trained me in 1997 to continue this method, and I have a successful swimming business to this day because of her. I will forever be grateful for knowing this amazing and beautiful soul. Karen, thank you.

February 7, 2016

A beautiful love story. Karen and Tom lived inspiring lives and leave four wonderful children to live their lives with the example they set.

Nelly Ukpokodu

February 7, 2016

You will forever be in our memory. We miss you and may you have eternal peace!

Chris, Greg, Brian and Emily--You are in our prayers. Karen and Tom were the best!

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